Brethren: It has taken me over an hour to get back into this site and be granted accesss again to post. The enemy, the devil, satan, is truly against anything or anyone that would dare to reach out to others and bring them into the Realm of Christ. I am thankful that my Lord rebukes the enemy and rewards perseverance and diligence to spread the word of God! I am glad that I am on the right side of Eternity. This only intensifies the message below that I was inspired to write by the Holy Spirit. I did not wake up today to write this dissertation, but I feel led to reach out to some unknown individual (at least unknown to me anyway), to expound upon my own travails in life and to possibly bring relief to a saddened, suffering heart filled with tremendous grief and anguish. I trust that the Holy Spirit will reach whoever He intends to reach, and that one individual will be blessed by Him. I truly believe that God has allowed me to experience my own deep, dark, horrific valley so as to provide hope to others who may be walking through their own gut-wrenching valley at the moment -- or are about to enter one. I can empathize with you, and all I can say is that there IS HOPE!!!! So whoever that blessed person is out there, this is for you!! May God bless you richly through your trial by fire!!! He loves you and will NOT forsake you! So many of us Christians have been dealing with terribly-difficult times the last few years (or longer), and will probably continue to do so until our Lord returns for us. Most of us are suffering in at least one of the following categories (and some of us in ALL of them): Financial, Marital, Familial, Physical, Psychological, Emotional, Occupational, Societal, Social, Scholastic, Spiritual, _______, etc. (Did I leave any out? If so, fill in the blank) How many times have you (as a faithful, serving, dedicated Christian) entertained any of the following thoughts? (be honest -- I must say with discomfiture that I have thought them all myself): “God where are you? I am falling deeper and deeper into this huge crevice, and there is not much further I can descend without being completely buried? It will take an immediate miracle from You to save me from the future that I foresee and worry so much about! How many more sleepless nights must I bear before You begin to alleviate this stressful and seemingly-hopeless situation?” “Lord, why have You seemingly abandoned me when I need You the most? Where are You? Why are You not answering my daily (hourly) prayers? I trust you, but this valley is SO DEEP and SO PAINFUL!!!” “What have I done wrong to deserve this fate? I know that I am a sinner like everybody else, and I cannot seem to help it -- I just continue to sin in some way every day. But I also know that I am saved by the Blood of our Lamb and that my sins (past, present, and FUTURE) are all forgiven. So why must I endure this type of pain and suffering when the unbelievers are thriving? They do not believe in You, they curse Your name, and they could not care less about allowing Your Will in their lives -- which would seriously disrupt the pursuit of their own selfish interests and endeavors. They seem to be living it up without any worries, while laughing and scoffing at us “ignorant” Christians who live in La-La Land” – who believe in the “Pie-in-the-sky of the great by-and-by”. “How much worse can it get before You finally pick me up, caress me in Your Loving arms, and save me from this tremendously debilitating burden?” When!!? God, why are you NOT answering my incessant prayers? If You don’t answer them now, then I cannot fathom how much worse it could possibly get before You ever answer them?” “I know all about the two sets of ‘Footprints’ in the sand, and that at the deepest points in my life there should only be ONE set of footprints (Yours) when You are carrying me when I can no longer walk. Lord, why are You not carrying me right now? And why are you allowing me to continue to walk alone through this hazardous and precariously-shifting sand? Even though I know You are beside me, it is just too hard to take another step!! Please lift me up NOW!!” “Would it be a sin Lord if I just took an entire bottle of pills tonight and just faded away in my sleep so as to be with you sooner rather than later? Of course I will never do that Lord (only You can give or take life), but I must confess that I desire so much to leave this depraved and wicked world that I am willing to take extreme measures if it meant that I could be with You sooner. I want to be with you NOW! I know I shouldn’t even contemplate such thoughts, Lord, and I truly apologize for my momentary lapse, but this is how LOW, and how DEFEATED I feel at the moment. Everything is going against me. I still trust that Your Timing is Perfect, but in my mortal cognizance Your Perfect timing seems WAY overdue! When Lord, WHEN are you going to start fixing what I can’t fix on my own? Why aren’t you Rapturing us NOW!!? THIS BRETHREN, IS WHERE OUR SPIRITUAL JOURNEY ACTUALLY BEGINS!! Unfortunately, the cessation of our problems and the sojourn into “peace and tranquility” does not commence until we are COMPLETELY broken!! Not until we lose ourselves and finally accept (despite our prideful arrogance) that we cannot fix our own problems in our own “logical” way, and that we MUST surrender EVERYTHING, EVERY DAY to God. Not until this point in our walk of faith will we start to see any traces of any kind of answered prayer. God can only be strong when we are weak; when we finally give in, when we finally accept that we cannot do anything on our own. God can only work in our lives when we begin to place our COMPLETE faith in Him, and Him alone!!! Only when we lose ourselves and seek God in all earnestness , will our faith begin to blossom like never before. Our everlasting relationship with our Saviour can only be fortified, solidified, buttressed, and reinforced here on earth through the trials by fire -- when God purifies, sanctifies, and prepares us for Eternity!! At the most dire of times, when life seemed hopeless, when I was completely broken and finally forced to let go of my ego and unconditionally submit my stubborn self to God, I determined to begin living day-to-day, one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time. Each day I would ask God to get me through this ONE day, and then I would thank Him every night for getting me through that ONE day. Then I would begin the next day with the same supplication: “Please Lord, give me Your strength to get through another day because there is NO WAY that I can do it in my own power.” WHICH FINALLY BRINGS ME TO THE VERY CRUX OF MY MESSAGE: God DOES answer prayers? An astounding and absolute YES – He just does not answer our prayers in the way, or in the timeframe, that we think He should!!! Even though I continue to be challenged repeatedly by condescending unbelievers who attack my “ignorance” and “naivety” for my belief in a God who does not “appear” to answer prayers during the numerous trials and tribulations that beset me, I am still in good standing with the Lord because I have been doing a lot of kneeling. I don’t know what tomorrow may bring, but I thank God for getting me to this point today that I could never have imagined possible a few years ago!!!! God began working miracles in my life when I began relentlessly praying when everything began going south; it was more PROBABILITY than POSSIBILITY that my life would be the exact opposite of what it is currently. I should have lost everything -- but I haven’t, and I thank God for His Grace in my life! My life is a living testimony to the “small” miracles that could ONLY come from a Faithful God in His Perfect timing. I would never want to go through that valley again (or for anybody else to go through it for that matter), but I am a better person for having persevered through it. All I can say is don’t give up, don’t give in, and don’t back down from the enemy. Claim the Name, the Blood, the Power, and the Authority of Jesus Christ to drive the enemy away each and every day – for the enemy never sleeps, never tires, and never desists from the assaults, harassment, and persecution.) Though it appears that I have hopefully begun to start the ascent out of this frightful valley (oh, Lord, let it be!!), it has taken time and perseverance to work through. God’s answers to my prayers were not immediate -- in fact I had to sweat each day out for more than five years (and I still look up daily requesting His Strength to endure ONE more day). But, I place my faith in a Loving, Wonderful God who never gives me more than I can handle. On those days when I think that I just cannot take one more thing going wayward without going ballistic, somehow God brings a certain person, or event, into my life at the last possible second that brings me the desperately-needed relief. All of a sudden I get a reprieve from the storm to take a breath. Trust God TODAY, and don’t worry about TOMORROW -- TRUST GOD TODAY, and then when tomorrow comes you can trust Him for tomorrow. Day-by-day, one day at at time!! God DOES answer prayer, just not in our timing, nor as quickly as we pray for, or expect. I am just amazed that God carried me through that valley (even though I could not see him, nor feel Him), and He compelled me to trust in Him completely and unconditionally. I am far from where I should be -- for I still experience feelings of doubt and worry -- but I am so much closer to Him than ever. His Will be done in my life -- whatever it is!!! I thought I trusted implicitly in Him after I was born again, but I was still trying to do too much on my own and was getting in the Way of His relationship with me. For this I am sorry, and paid a steep price for my pride. And now, today, He has impelled me to relive and write about some hurtful periods of my life in order to encourage another Brother or Sister in Christ. God bless you whoever you may be -- God loves you and will carry you through every valley. Maybe it will require a period of your life with just His set of Footprints in the sand, or maybe it will be the RAPTURE!!! I pray for the latter!!! God bless you, you Child of Christ!!!!!!!!!! YBIC, Humbly Irrelevant You indeed bring up a very human response to tragedy, trials and suffering. We always end up asking God why, and why me. Firstly our time here upon this Earth is a time of testing. The testing of our hearts that we will either love our creator rather or his creation or his blessings. Secondly, the issue of sin which yet plagues all of mankind to this very day! Thirdly, we all want to assign blame or guilt when we suffer! Fourthly, we often forget the principle of divine curse. From one generation to the next! One of the consequences of sin. Poor choices and lack of leading by the Holy Spirit are also in contention as to the "why"! Any given number of reasons can be offered. Adam and Eve were promised death for their disobedience and we as their family suffer under those same consequences. I think that we all need to get beyond asking that question and rather ask the Lord himself to help and sustain us through whatever trial we are encountering, and then give Him the glory. Lastly, if I had a nickel for every time I heard the assertion "the Lord told me" or "the spirit led me" unless and until the Spirit bears witness, those statements are invalid. I am reminded of a person who graced christian websites with christian hyperbole, attitude and emotion. This person began to attract their own entourage, displaying a certain knowledge for scripture. This person also was adept at spiritual sensationalism. Yet within a short period of time, this person was known to have left children and spouse behind to follow a cultic culture following after the promise of becoming an angelic being! Many claiming the name of Christ and placed in positions of authority and Christian exposure have done unmentionable things profaning the name of Christ! Not a new story! Guess the saying is true. It's not how you start, but rather how you finish. We must all hold on to the very end! Let's be real here. TR Yes, Jesus is the Potter and we are the clay. He is molding us and sometimes He hast to put us through various trials (kiln oven) to burn off the rough edges so we stop clinging to the world and depend and look to Him for everything. Along with how faithful we are in serving the Lord, plus how we react to our trials and pass each test will determine what job duties are assigned to us on the eternal side. Please know my heart. I would never demean anyone in suffering. Jesus certainly didn't. That's why He healed so many. For while in our presence the grace of His healing power was made available. I believe that this was part of His earthly ministry, His compassionate heart revealed! Having accomplished His calling He even now and all the more answers to honor the Father and do the Father's will. For the compassions of Christ were part of the Father's will! Whether by a brazen serpent placed upon a pole, or with Christ on a cross healing us by his stripes, we sometimes experience healing in the flesh or in our spirit! No doubt Abraham's heart was grieved when tried by being called to sacrifice Isaac. How much more was the Father's heart tried when He volunteered His own Son to be sacrificed. Unlike Isaac, Christ is sacrificed daily by all who live upon the earth. This also is why the apostles and early saints gloried in their sufferings. Not a relevant teaching in today's churches. Who can know the whole mind of Almighty God?! I forever glory whenever a healing or miracle is wrought, but I can't demand or dictate their occurance!!! TR Humbly —- Amen and Amen! When I have reached my lowest, God reminds me how others have and are suffering greater than me. I lift my eyes and cry out with my heart “Abba Father”. God is faithful. God continue to bless you with gentleness and insight in-spite of and because of LIFE. :prayer-hands: Tammie: I believe it was you who corrected my upper-case letters to lower-case in the Subject Line. Thank you -- I couldn't figure out how to edit it after I posted. Thanks again! tenderreed and Geri7 -- thank you for your comments. See y'all soon! Humbly HI —- not sure it was me, but I do know how :scratch: incredibly exciting times! Beautiful post. And there’s so much darkness and depression. Living minute by minute at the feet of our Savior is our lifeline. TR - quick question. You said Lastly, if I had a nickel for every time I heard the assertion “the Lord told me” or “the spirit led me” unless and until the Spirit bears witness, those statements are invalid. Will you help clarify this? I do believe I’m hearing more from the Lord, and as long as it’s in line with Scripture, does it need something else? What do you mean about the Spirit bearing witness? In the freedom we have to walk with the Spirit of God, we can sometimes be fooled into thinking that our own desires and agenda's are rubber stamped by claiming the Spirit's leading. Many seemingly don't take the time to enter into deep prayer or seek a confirmation that it is indeed the Spirits leading or voice that we are being guided by! Often the results of our actions don't glorify God. Seems to me that there are times we are to step out in faith not fully confident of how God will be glorified, and this is great! But there are times when we act or speak from our own soulish desires. Just saying that indeed we must make every effort to be certain before we ascribe words or a course of action to the Lord! That we don't overstep and become presumptuous before the Lord. TR 
