- April 29, 2017 at 3:16 am #131128
Hello brothers and sisters:
I am so very heart broken as I found out my boyfriend was seeking out other women- he denies its anything bad- but it happens all the time.. He breaks my heart- but I know my value and cannot compromise– He’s been out all night with another woman and will be gone with her for several days- I just want to cry and pull the covers over my head…. I can’t sleep knowing he’s out there with her and doesn’t even text me… God has something better in store for me..
I wanted to let everyone know- I am still at the shelter for domestic violence and God has provided a property for me to move in- its for disabled people so I can stay in my own 2 bedroom apartment for free until I choose to leave. Please lift up the particular property I will be at and for there to be an opening soon.. I also need help with my phone bill and car insurance- Praise God for his provision and blessings!
God bless you all-
Laura Molly (faithwon05)April 29, 2017 at 8:21 am #131135
Dear sister Laura —
There’s a saying, something like it’s easier to mistake brass than clay for gold.
Which is just to say, we long for relationship.
The gold standard is Jesus.
No human, male or female, can be as close or as good for us as He is. Some people are like clay, and it’s easy to just work with them, be around them. You see what they are, and it’s okay.
Others are like brass, so shiny, so close to gold. We fall hard for them, and then we’re disappointed when they are just brass after all.
Yes, Jesus has a better match for you. Maybe here, and maybe Himself in Heaven.
I am praying for you. I hope you’ve been able to get some rest since you wrote this post. Thank you for sharing your need with us.
Love, your sister in Christ, SweetbriarApril 29, 2017 at 8:41 am #131136
Psalm 34:18 “The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” May you sense the reality of His nearness in your pain. HE is faithful to never desert you, forsake you, or betray you. My sense is that you would do well to set aside any pursuit of male companionship and instead seek wholeheartedly the Lover of your soul. May He grant you the grace to do so. Praying for His provision to meet your needs and for Him to be your refuge as He creates an opening for you to find physical shelter from the storm. In Yeshua’s Name.
John 14:1-3 “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also."April 29, 2017 at 9:18 am #131139
So sorry that you have been hurt by your boyfriend. Praying for you. Father thank you for your goodness and mercy towards us and for the provision You have for our sister. We love you and our family in Christ! In Jesus name amen
It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. Psalm 118:8April 29, 2017 at 3:53 pm #131145
Two unequally yoked women cheated on me and I think I’m a catch as I m sure you are too : – ) It took years for me to recover but it made me stronger and no what I really want and dont want. Hang in there. He’s with you. I know its painful.April 29, 2017 at 8:09 pm #131157
If this boyfriend really loved you, he wouldn’t hurt you like this. Boulder 95 is right. You need to be equally yoked with a Christian man who loves and respects you. This one is acting selfishly. He made HIS CHOICE WHEN HE TREATED YOU THIS WAY. If he truly loved you, he wouldn’t treat you like this. He wouldn’t risk losing you. His actions say he doesn’t care if he does.
You say you know your worth and you won’t compromise. Now follow through. Make the break. We are praying for you to stand strong. To overcome any negative patterns of the past. There is no saving this relationship. He made his choice already and it has never been about just one woman. This is a self- centered selfish man who isn’t interested in a healthy relationship with you. His actions are hurtful and destroying you. He knows this but doesn’t care how it impacts you. This is all about him alone. Therefore, he must become history. You not only deserve better but can’t live like this. You are a daughter of The King and deserve to be treated accordingly. We are to live like it. Unselfishly. This man’s actions are selfish. He doesn’t care how he is treating you or how his actions hurt you.
You are at a shelter for domestic abuse which indicates past negative relationship and possible negative patterns that don’t work for you. Don’t get caught up in repeating negative past behavior patterns. You can’t afford to fall back into patterns that haven’t worked in the past. I don’t know your situation but I fear this for you. And maybe also it’s too soon to make a new relationship work anyway. You need time to heal. A time to learn more about yourself as a person and not in a relationship while healing and growing. A time with no relationships for awhile.
If you accept his actions and make excuses for him, then you have been caught up in his lies, entrapped and abused and are part of the problem yourself. It takes two to allow a diseased relationship to continue. Stand up for yourself. You need time to heal. Rediscover yourself. You don’t need to take on another’s problems right now. You know what you must do to get out of this unhealthy relationship that will only worsen. If allowed to continue other innocents may get impacted later. Ask Jesus to help you and strengthen you. Protect you. It seems too soon for another relationship now.
Let this guy know his actions are unacceptable and leave. Write him off. Stick to your guns; don’t back down. You are sending a message you won’t tolerate this abuse. You mean what you say. You can’t be wishy washy about it. You deserve better and don’t want to get caught up in his game- playing excuses. There is no acceptable excuse. Period. A boyfriend like this is an enemy. Imagine this behavior as a possible husband later. This is who he is. Behavior won’t change. You’d never be able to trust him. You can’t now. He will torture you with all his selfish excuses. It’s all about him and what he wants. That is not a relationship and not someone who cares deeply for you. He’s shown you mean nothing to him. This has all the earmarks of an abusive relationship. This man is self- centered and only sees his side. His actions reveal disrespect and selfishness. This will only worsen as you tolerate abuse from him. It becomes a vicious cycle. You must make a right choice here and now to put a stop to this behavior. You deserve better. Make up your mind and leave this relationship. You will never regret this decision. Imagine if this was a marriage with responsibility for children and an abusive , selfish father at the heart of it. This is a form of control that will only escalate if tolerated now. The only way to get respect is to leave and to stick to your guns. He may regret his actions later but don’t back down and accept excuses. If you do, you become part of the problem and it won’t end in any happy ever after scenario. If you do, then you only have yourself to blame at that point. You really need this time to overcome the relationship you just came out of. Give yourself this time as a gift to yourself before taking on another’s problems, too. You are okay alone and don’t need a man to lean on. And this one isn’t available for any leaning anyway.
You have had a glimpse of what life would be like with this man. You obviously don’t like what you see. Only you can do what needs to be done next. Make no excuses for him. Recognize the truth here and act on it. Pray God sends the right man your way. Many have to experience Mr. Wrong before finding Mr. Right. Just work on self to attract the right man and this begins by recognizing and dealing with what is wrong here now. You don’t want just anyone. But a special God loving man who will treat you right as you will him. Timing is off and this isn’t the right man.
Praise God He is providing a rent free appt. and meeting needs as you recover. He will help in this matter of relationship, too. Ask for His protection.
The eyes of the Lord range throughout the entire earth, to strengthen those whose heart is true to him.April 29, 2017 at 8:46 pm #131158
Faithwon05, what wonderful news about the apartment! Praying one ooens up for you very soon and for the Lord’s provision for phone and insurance.
I’m sorry your boyfriend is hurting you. Perhaps it’s a blessing God is showing you this side of him before you both think of marriage.
I’ll be blunt. Easier said than done but Kick him to the curb. You’re worth so much more. Our savior Jesus thought you were worth dying for.
You deserve a loving, faithful man.
Jesus taught us to forgive one another. Yes, but that doesn’t mean you have to stay in this relationship as your not married.
Praying the Lord will see tou through this painful time and bring healing.
You must be logged in to reply to this topic.